I'm on a Roll/ I'm on a Roll...This Time. I Feel My Luck Could Change

One thing I've recently discovered: wheelchair basketball is a lot easier when your hip stays in the socket. It's actually, like, fun and shit. (I know. Imagine that). Even though I'm slower than a novel by Marilynne Robinson (and, truthfully, a lot less beautifully rendered), and even though I had the experience of "I'm executing this skill....five seconds too late for it to be of any use" on a regular basis, I had a great time at practice this evening. It helped that I was shooting pretty well--I even made a three-pointer on a hail mary jack-up at a buzzer--and also that it's hard not to laugh when you're strapped in so loosely that you're basically standing up every time you do anything.

I must say, however, that being back at practice in New West brings a soul-crushing feeling of deja vu. The last time I practiced at Douglas College on a regular basis was from 2005 to the summer of 2006, right before I moved to Illinois. It was a terrible year, worse than this past year actually. This year has been dramatic (surgery! Detached tendons! Loose sockets! Anti-asses! Graduation! Loss of pretty much everything I hold dear, except my family and a few of my friends!), but 2005-2006 was like Chinese water torture: just unceasing little drips of loneliness and boredom and rainy Vancouver winters. Now, granted I at least knew in 2006 that I was moving to Illinois and that I was about to make a positive life change, whereas now I have no ready escape routes, but still. I will take dramatic over unceasing ennui any day.

So, yes, wheelchair basketball is going well, except for the fact that I've lost most of the feeling in my right foot. (Usually, I can't feel my right big toe, but now it's sort of spread to the whole foot). I don't really care about this. As long as the hip stays in the socket, I'm a happy camper. I can't help but wonder, however, whether this is really a good idea. Am I just regressing? Am I just retreating back to the life that made me so unhappy in 2005-2006 simply because I have no other options? Am I trading in my long-term health for a few moments of stress relief? Are wheelchair basketball and I about to go into one of those on-again/off-again/on-and-off-at-the-same-time-again relationships? In other words: am I booty calling wheelchair basketball because I haven't had a date in awhile or am I forming a positive relationship?